I Must Be Moving Up In The World

  As I was typing the last post, my phone/Big Brother Machine dinged. Another email. I don't know why I even look because almost every single email I get on the four accounts I have going to it is garbage. This last one, however, makes me think that maybe I am short-selling my abilities to the world.
  I pride myself on rising from the ashes of homelessness and working my way up through the trenches to get to the admirable position that I enjoy now. Perhaps foolishly though, I have contented myself in my current position in life. After all, I make real good money, people respect me and value my opinion, and I can go anywhere in my chosen field from guy who sweeps the floor to guy who has the keys and the alarm code. I pretty much have everything I've ever wanted and I'm not greedy. Who couldn't become content?
   My chosen field is food, warehousing, distribution, manufacturing, logistics, and transportation. Like I said, I can go anywhere. This email though, makes me think that "anywhere" is much much bigger than I thought.
   I have had a resume on Career Builder since a week after there was a Career Builder. I have gotten quite a few unsolicited responses from there and while some are legit, most are Russians trying to get me to handle their company's "international financial business".
   Just a few minutes ago, I got one that is making me ponder my comparably humble service offerings to the world as I would have never dreamed of applying for this position, but perhaps I need to rethink my potential. The following is a slightly trimmed-down direct copy and paste (I swear this is true):

 I hope all is well.  My name is **** ******** and I'm a recruiter with *********.  We came across your resume in our database and feel that you could be qualified for one of our positions with a Global Pharmaceutical Company.  The job description is posted below for your review.

Job Title:  Sr. Pharmacovigilance Safety Scientist

Location:  **** *********, PA

Yeah, that's right. Eat me. 

   Trust me when I tell you that the description of duties is as difficult to comprehend as the word "Pharmacovigilance". I never in my wildest dreams had myself pegged as a scientist, but maybe I've been aiming too low. I mean sure, I've mixed chemicals before and experimented with plenty of drugs but never with the intent of documenting that research and using it to aid the whole of mankind on a global scale.  The location is good too and I used to live right where that is. I think I know who it is even. I would like to move back there as well. 
   The more I think about it, the more I think I want to be a Sr. (SENIOR! That's not even the Spanish one, bitches!) Pharmacovigilance (spellcheck doesn't even know that word!) Safety Scientist. Shit, if Sepracor can put out a drug and claim that "science does not know exactly how Lunesta works", then I might just be fucking qualified because I would actually try to figure that shit out!
                       Imagine...         
                                          me...

Mr. Scientist.

Man, I like the sound of that.